What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Why do some people dislike rap and hip hop music despite there being poor quality music in every genre?

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Have you ever forcibly sucked someone’s dick?

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Time (physics): Who started counting our current time or is it just "set" by some scientific measure?

Make Nazis afraid again!

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Do you think some men have sex with prostitutes because they're too afraid to talk to women? Money does the talking for them.

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Are there any more 'nun' jokes?

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Do most narcissists have good intentions as long as you are under their control?

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Can you show pictures of your penis, big or small?

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

When Chinese people see my pets, will they think of it as their food?

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

TEXT:

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Are LGBT people accepted in Japan?

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

What is the kinkiest thing you and your sex partner have done in bed?

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

What was the craziest place that you had sex with someone in public?

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.